The current schedule . . .

So in the life of foster care to adoption you get lots of new friends.
We have a busy schedule right now and thank goodness we do not have extra doctor visits because Little Man is a normal healthy boy.
New Stork visits us every week, right now on monday mornings. Twice a week, wednesdays and fridays, we drive 120 miles roundtrip to see Birth Mom for an hour of supervised visitation.
Last week I met the County Social Worker who is in charge of the case now. She will be coming to our home at some point. I am not sure about the frequency of that visit.
No use for me to get cranky about the intrusions into our life because this will be the pattern for some time to come. I guess in one year from now we might have less people in our lives, but there is just no telling.
Today I feel very accomplished. I was able to make valentine jam thumbprint cookies for my hubby AND take care of an awake baby.
Little Man is sleeping right now and I think I'll get daring and attempt to shower AND wash my hair.
Crazy I know.

Ice Breaker

Yeah so we did have that meeting one week ago. It was very casual - Just us. Hubby, Me, New Stork Little Man and Birth Mom. Not even a single person representing the county that took the baby from Birth Mom. But then again they said the point was to talk about the baby and not the case. Alright - Birth Mom was "fine." She told us what she knew about Little Man, which isn't a lot since she has not had him with her. We let her know he is doing very well. Our New Stork tried to ask some probing questions about possible fathers, but it got nowhere. I think there are some very fuzzy details in Birth Mom's mind.
Funniest part she said she was concerned that we had to drive so far to bring the baby, but we looked like older people and were probably good drivers.
Hubby and I left feeling nothing but compassion for the Birth Mom. If she can do this she needs to get her baby back quick. The "clock" of services will not being until the next hearing is done. That hearing got pushed back to March, apparently there is more to investigate before the disposition. September would be the month for termination of services IF she shows no progress.
Hard for me to focus on just loving the little guy while he is here, but now that he smiles a bit its easier to live in the moment.

on edge

Not because of the baby, no Little Man is still awesome. Sometimes he sleeps a little less, sometimes a bit more.
No I am on edge because tomorrow we meet his birth mother. This is an organized meeting between all parties involved to communicate about care of the child. And, I suppose, to form partnerships in the reunification process. All good things.
I prefer my current illusion of LM as my forever child. I know its a lie I tell myself. I know it is for his good that we find out as much as we can about his bio family and support his mother in getting well. Maybe they have even identified a father by now. It would be nice for LM to at least know who the guy is or was. I can run wild in my head making up the endings to stories, maybe we'll hear some facts tomorrow. I must suppress the urge to present myself as the superior parental choice for LM because truth is, it is not a choice right now. The court has its standards and bio parents hold the rights.
No matter what LM gets a "win" and that is good.